In March of 2026, Futures Without Violence, a nonprofit which leverages anti-violence programming and legislation to create safer, healthier communities for all, hosted a free webinar titled ‘Building a Healthy Future for Boys Who Game.’
The webinar (which you can watch a recording of on YouTube), featured a panel of speakers not just from FWV, but also from other organizations including Games for Change, Common Sense Media, and Big Brothers Big Sisters of America. During the webinar, speakers from each organization shared their insights on the growing trend of young men struggling to find meaningful connections and trusted relationships in a social space that’s becoming more online and more inundated with harmful media.
Being a male gamer myself, I was naturally drawn to the webinar’s subject matter, especially since I’ve previously explored how themes of masculinity and male connection in video games overlap with the work we do here at REACH. The data shared during the webinar shows that there’s a lot of work to be done when it comes to supporting young men who game. However, it also shows that there are a lot of young men who are receptive to doing that work, and thus having a healthier, more positive relationship with gaming as a result.
What the Data Shows
One of the data sources that Common Sense Media shared during its portion of the webinar was this report it published last October. The report, titled ‘Boys in the Digital Wild: Online Culture, Identity, and Well-Being,’ revealed some eye-opening statistics based on key findings from a nation-wide study of adolescent boys that was conducted in July of 2025.
The full report is worth reading, but here are some stats that jumped out at me:
- 73% of the boys who participated in the study (ranging in age from 11 to 17 years old) said they regularly see “masculinity content” (i.e. content focused on traditionally “masculine” ideals such as making money, building muscle, fighting, weapons, and dating women) while online.
- 69% of participants said they have encountered online content that promotes harmful gender stereotypes and/or behaviors (such as the idea that all girls routinely manipulate boys to get what they want, or that girls should focus only on home and family).
- Participants with high levels of digital masculinity content exposure reported having more negative self-esteem and feeling more lonely. They also said they felt more pressured to suppress their emotions and avoid showing vulnerability (i.e. concepts that are seen as more “feminine”).
- 62% of participants expressed a belief in caring about others despite the harmful masculinity content they encountered. The study highlighted the rift this often creates in young men where they feel more comfortable caring for others than they do caring for themselves.
That last statistic provides some hope for parents and guardians of young men, but it also shows that the population of young men in this country (and elsewhere) are facing an uphill battle.
The idea that boys and men need to “act tough” and never cry or express emotion was already prevalent when *I* was a boy back in the 90’s and early 2000’s. I shamefully remember how terrified I and my brothers were of being labeled as “gay” or “girly” (or even more harmful labels I won’t repeat here) and, worse, being seen as such in the eyes of our male friends.
I can only imagine how much more intense it is for young men today, who are often navigating online spaces as often as they are physical ones, and at much earlier ages (when I was a kid, online gaming was still in its early infancy, and devices like smartphones didn’t even exist yet). Thankfully, the FWV webinar took a more optimistic approach, reframing the idea of young boys primarily socializing in online spaces less as an inevitable pitfall and more as an opportunity to help them build good habits.
How Can Gaming Help Rather Than Harm?
One statistic I didn’t share above is that roughly 97% of teen and pre-teen boys identify as gamers (according to data shared in the webinar). This isn’t terribly surprising given how much more accessible gaming is now for both casual and dedicated users, with free-to-play games and mobile gaming joining already established outlets such as gaming on a computer or console.
Today’s online-centric gaming space admittedly isn’t without its share of issues, the most prominent being the rise of toxic sub-cultures where the cloak of anonymity inspires some to gleefully inflict their cruelty and ignorance on total strangers. However, if managed in a healthy and safe manner, gaming can provide an outlet for connection, collaboration, and creativity, three things that everyone, not just young men, could use more of in their lives.
As Dr. Rachel Kowert, a member the Games for Change organization, explained during the webinar, the answer isn’t to simply ban young men from playing online games or heavily regulate the amount of time they spend online. A much more effective approach is to, in Dr. Kowert’s words, recognize that behavior is a signal.
A young man spending nine hours a day playing online games may sound bad at first glance, but what exactly are they doing during those nine hours? Are they playing with friends? Are they laughing, smiling, and appearing to genuinely enjoy themselves? Looking beyond their gaming habits, are they still getting their homework done? Are they still finding time to eat and get enough sleep? Do they still go out and see their friends “IRL” (in real life)?
Spending so many hours in front of a screen might still warrant a conversion, one where the parent/guardian comes in with an open mind rather than pre-loaded assumptions. However, such high amounts of gaming aren’t really an issue if the answers to all the above questions are “yes,” since it sounds like the young man in question is engaging with it in a healthy, balanced manner.
As Dr. Kowert also notes in the webinar, there is no “magic number” when determining how many hours of gaming are “healthy.” As with other online behaviors such as social media usage, the best approach is often to just establish a dialogue with the young men in your life. Make sure they know you’re someone who won’t judge them or take a hardline “I know best” approach.
At REACH, we recognize that domestic violence survivors are the experts of their own lives, and the same holds true for young men who might need help navigating online spaces, gaming or otherwise. There is a lot about the gaming space, and online culture in general, that’s outside of our control, but we can still control how we’re supporting young men who are growing up in this new online-centric world.
Additional Reading & Resources
Raising Good Gamers – An initiative that focuses on creative positive change in the culture of online gaming for youth.
Parents’ Ultimate Guides to Gaming | Common Sense Media – A handy list of guides for parents to better understand games and platforms that are popular amongst youth gamers such as Minecraft, Roblox, and Discord.
White Ribbon – A nonprofit organization that promotes healthy ideas of masculinity and helps build gender equity through its ‘White Ribbon Campaign’ movement.
